white supremacy is the dumbest shit ever

white supremacy is so fucking stupid.

so, lets say we live in a world where everyone is white. what happens next? what's actually different. literally nothing is different. people are still gonna be posting dumb shit on twitter, life will still have no meaning, and all the "tiny divisions" which have been overlooked in the name of a larger threat will quickly become hot button issues and drive people apart.

Now you might say "but x^2, the blacks and immigrants are taking my jobs so if i kill them all i'll get my job back." If you said that, i would respond with "no dumbass, because if you had ever read a fucking book in your whole life you'd know that 'immigrants taking your jobs' is a myth that is consistently perpetuated by politicians for political power." Furthermore, lets say we kill all the immigrants and blacks so that they aren't taking ur jobs anymore. what then? your job is gonna get taken from you by someone who is just better than you at that job, or knows someone in the company, or blah blah blah.

white supremacy fascinates me so much because it is such a thin facade for an existential sense of purpose. thats the only reason anyone believes this shit, lets be real. its just another dumb thing for people to believe in so that people can feel a sense of "meaning" and purpose in their lives. however, these kids, right, instead of getting into art or being hedonistic, they somehow got cocked up in white supremacy, and now my friend almost got hit by a car at that charlottesville rally. it fucking busts me up.

like, just think about that name: the "unite the right" rally. what you might notice here is that word "unite" which is, lets face it, a democratic word. and its a disgusting word. all these dramatic forms of unity (be it unity amongst trans ppl or unity amongst workers or whathaveyou) are so fucking pathetic. unity isn't real. community, in the liberal-rose-colored-glasses sense of the word is such a lie and is always a deception. and thats exactly what white supremacy is, at its core: its just a dumb thing for desperate groups of people to bond over and pretend their life as any meaning. its the same as My Little Pony, anti-facism, trans solidarity, and so on. its all garbage.

but unlike My Little Pony, these white supremacists think its okay to kill people and create violence. and thats where the real rub is. the fact of the matter is that white supremacist organizations have been around for decades. they've even committed acts of violence for decades. but for a long time, at least for most of my early childhood, everyone thought white supremacists were contained. even tho they were still gross, we didn't really think they had any power. we didn't think they were gonna make any real moves. but now they have, and now we all have to fucking do something abt it.

and sure, maybe some people are "excited" for this opportunity to make a difference. maybe for some people, this is exactly the kind of political fight they have been waiting for to give themselves existential purpose, but not me. i don't really give a fuck abt any of this bullshit. i wasn't put on this earth to be an "anti-fascist" or "anti-racist" or whatever. but now i have to be. i have to do a bunch of dumb bullshit that i don't give a fuck abt because its the right thing to do.

and whats real ironic is that this is what minorities have prolly been feeling for centuries. there is just all this stupid fucking bullshit that they have had to deal with for no real reason, and they are sick and tired of it. but i guess the key difference is that history documents the plight of minorities. it even documents the plights of the white working class. but it DOESN'T EVER document the struggles of poor whities whose identity is "under siege" by a bunch of brown people because that doesn't really happen. white ppl dont have institutionalized disadvantages (at least not just for being white). so what are these neo-nazis so busted abt?

some might say "oh, these are just poor people who are being unfairly manipulated by those in power." great, except that all the people at charlottesville were bougie motherfuckers who could afford the plane ticket out. charlottesville is a bougie fucking town. these are not people who have been "left behind" by capitalism, these are people who are deliberately re-tooling an ideology because they want an excuse to do whatever they want. these are people who wanna "burn shit" and "fuck school" but instead of just listening to Odd Future they became white supremacists. little did they realize that if they wanted an excuse to riot they could just become sports fans!

because that's what its really about: its about people who never learned that the world doesn't revolve around them yelling abt having to finally grow up. make no mistake, white supremacists are children. driving a car into some protesters is a child's idea, and children would do shit like that all the time if we let them drive. children are not pure, they are just incapable of doing anything because they are tiny. but eventually these children start to become big people, to the point where people start calling them "adults" for some reason (i know this because this is what happened to me). and because you can't actually know what goes on inside someone else's mind, you just kind of have to trust that this big person is really an adult instead of child. but when shit like this happens, we know.

its all just teen angst, its all just whining. it's so fucking stupid and pathetic and it makes me irritated. when david duke says he is gonna "take our country back" what the fuck is he even talking about? it was never "our" country, why does it need to be "our country," why do you have so little self-esteem that you need to feel this pathetic sense of "belonging" to the "your country." no one gives a fuck abt you, and we know this because, as I said before, when we thought white supremacists weren't a "threat" to safety we literally let them just hang out. and we would've kept doing that, to be honest. but now you guys have started making a ruckus and we literally have to scold you because you are fucking up everyone's day.

don't kid yourself: white supremacists are just regular fucks like everyone else. there isn't anything deficient abt them, be it mentally, physical, economically, anything. they are regular ass, boring as fuck people, but instead of finding purpose in literally anything else, they opted to become really into a stupid idea founded by idiots in the 1800s. and at the bottom, all white supremacists know this, or at least the organizers do. lets cut right through the fucking bulllshit.

its all so fucking stupid.

fucking really guys

Like really? are we so fucking stupid that we need satire fucking telegraphed to us? Like, I get that people are dumb, but shit, really? Can't people just like look around for a bit? Like shit, people are just fucking stupid. Its just because everybody got all fucked up about the brown recluse spider shit and now facebook is doing this as perhaps the ultimate joke. Like Mark Zuckerburg knows how fucking funny this is. Unless its just an attempt to make the user experience as vanilla as possible, in which case mark zuckerburg probably doesn't even give a shit about it, he just wants that sweet advertising moeney. Anyway, this was just something that I thought was really silly and wanted to share. Also, I'm mad as hell.

Got my meds back

So that was fun, but not that fun. I'm glad i have my medication now because that means I can actually do things. In fact I've basically finished 2 more tracks on the rap album. So that's pretty cool. I forgot what not taking my meds for so long feels like, and I don't know why I used to think it was "fun". In all honesty, it's kind of like tripping acid. My brain moves a mile a minute and thinking is so easy but actually doing stuff is hard AF and interacting with people is a bit weird and like everything is just really overwhelming. Idk, its not that fun. I mean it is fun, but its not like, good. Idk. It's weird. It's not healthy probably.

The good news is that a thought alot about the game I'm making. Not Varg (speaking of which i just played through the demo and it says it would be out summer of 2013 WOW i fucked that up), but another game. It's called "My 8-bit Existential Fantasy" and is basically a ripoff of Yume Nikki. It's gonna be weird AF and creepy as hell. I'm also gonna have fun designing all the music which is gonna be balls weird. Like all sorts of weird mangled and bizarre loops and all sorts of disorienting things that are bound to cause cognitive dissonance. It'll be a grand old time. Idk when thats gonna happen though.

For now, I need to concentrate on finishing the rap album. That shit has been unreleased for way to long and it makes me sad. I have like 4 of these albums planned out in my head and its like most of them don't really need any new songs (except for one). but like I've got the schematic of all of them laid out. I just need to stop being lazy and actually make them happen.

I feel really bad about wasting my break, but there wasn't much I could do about it. Like, Just coding the midi sequencer was alot of effort, and the only reason I was able to finish it was becuase i could copy alot of code from other projects. Idk, ADHD is real man.

Anyway, hopefully classes wont be to tough this term and I can still make some music. I'm gonna do a ton of live shows this term, thats for sure. idk if i'm gonna do another radio show, but like, i'm gonna perform a bunch. so if you're in minnesota, check it out.

I'm gonna go to bed.
             

Why the future won't solve all our problems

Everyone (and when I say that I mean myself, i don't know enough people to say that accurately, but I assume there are others) tend to look toward the future with a false sense of optimism. "All our problems will be fixed in the future" I say to myself. "Everyone will stop being stupid because education will get better", "that energy crisis will figure itself out because renewable energy will get more and more efficient", the list of problems that the simple passage of time seems to solve goes on and on and on and it isn't hard for me to imagine a future cyber paradise where everyone listens to Far Side Virtual all day atop geodesic skyscrapers.

It is true that as the future goes on we will get more liberal. This is fact. The absolutism of the paleolithic era, the simple kill or be killed dogma will no doubt vanish as time goes on and technology improves simply because life itself will get less competitive. Our ability to satisfy ourselves biologically will no doubt improve dramatically to the point where it may never even be a question whether or not food is on the table. I have no doubt that simple progress will be able to completely satisfy the bottom layer of Maxwell's hierarchy of needs. In the future (assuming nothing extremely cataclysmic happens) we will no doubt be able to maintain homeostasis like never before.

But think about how many of us actually complain about maintaining homeostasis on any given day. Admittedly, the answer is quite a sizable majority of population, but certainly none of the people who can speak the language this blog is written have that much a problem with homeostasis (even that statement isn't entirely true.) But my point is, you, the person reading this blog (who certainly has enough free time to journey deep into the Google search engine to find it) probably has no trouble accounting for all your basics biological needs on a long time basis. Homeostasis is not what we are worried about when we look hopefully to the future. What we are hoping for, even praying for in the future is the total absence of conflict (and even just unwanted turmoil) in general. We are hoping for the elimination of all our current societal woes, be they nuclear war, poverty, energy crisis, etc. We look to the future with the hope that everything that is problem now will be not a problem later. Then we get all fuzzy inside.

Lets grant that though. Let's assume that every problem we have now will be solved in the future. Great, that fantastic. Your life still won't be a living seventh heaven. Do you want to know why? When you eliminate all the problems you know you have, the problems that you don't know you have will emerge. I mean, even if we treat the universe as a static object that won't collapse into a black hole in 90 billion years, and we exempt the earth from external apocalypses brought by asteroids and the like, we will still face the unforeseen consequences of our actions in the self contained environment of our planet. Do you think anyone for saw the problems we would face today a hundred years ago? Of course not. People a hundred years ago didn't know computers would be a thing. I mean, its quite possible people wrote about them in stories and the like, but they were never considered as a practical reality. And they shouldn't have been. It would've been illogical to prepare for something that we weren't sure existed or not.

But all examples aside, the point I'm making still stands. There are always unknown unknowns, and even if they wont be unknown in the future, they are unknown now. And that's the crux of my argument. The problems we have now are no doubt a small, select portion of all the problems we could be having. Even excluding the fact that humans are always gonna remain the fickle creatures that we are, the universe (heck even just the planet earth) is bigger then you can ever imagine, and that's not any fault of your own. You can at most only know about 300 people, what makes you think you can predict the collective consequences of 7 billion people?

"But x^2," you think as read this blog, "surely our ability to predict the future will get better as well! We may not be able to process the universe, but surely we can build a computer that can. I mean it's all just math, right?" Fair enough, we may be able to build a computer that can comprehend all seven billion people on the planet and then run predictive analysis to determine the best course of action. My point still stands: When you've dealt with all the problems you can see, the only problems you have are the one's you aren't aware of, and to suggest that there is a finite amount of things you can't be aware of is almost certainly illogical (and that wouldn't be very futurist of you). On another note, what makes you think we will be able to understand the answer the computer gives us? Why should we follow the advice that doesn't make sense to us? And don't pull that "God works in mysterious ways bullshit" because that's not very futurist of you either.

Neil Degrasse Tyson said that if you define God as all the stuff we aren't able to explain then God will slowly shrink as scientific progress moves onward. Sure, there may come a point were we are able to explain everything that happens, but that doesn't mean that we will be able to stop it from happening (heck, maybe it will turn out that it needs to happen.) There is a reason why throughout all of human history people who think the present is Humanity's lowest point and exist alongside people who think this is the highest point. We can only compare things to the past, and if things look worse now than they did back then (or better), what else are you supposed to think? We know we can't predict the future, so we ignore it, but in doing so, we get all worked up about the present.

If believing in the future is your way of coping with an uncertain world, then that's fine. Believe all you want. Base your dreams on the knowledge of the future, but make base your reasoning on the knowledge of the present. And besides, how fair would it be if at some point humans just stopped having problems? That would be a boring ass place to live. Conflict is what makes life interesting. You can't have good without the bad. That's something that will always be true.

But who knows for sure? Only time will tell.